Do you fish for compliments? Have the habit of asking your partner where they are going, even though you know the answer? Do you badger them for extra attention despite spending the day together? Maybe you ask them about a coworker repeatedly who is only a friend. All of these indicate that you are insecure in your relationship. This can result in disaster because you will end up driving your partner away. Of course, you don’t want that to happen and in order to ensure it doesn’t, you have to learn how to overcome insecurity.
What should you do? Let’s find out through the following tips on how to overcome insecurity:
How to Overcome Insecurity and Save Your Relationship
Stop thinking it is about you
You will be running around in circles if you have a self-centered worldview. If your partner doesn’t want to go out, don’t think it is because of you when it could be because they are tired. Don’t psychoanalyze every word and always be more present at the moment, so you can understand the message behind their physical presence, tone, and posture. If you obsess about hidden meanings, you are more likely to miss the point altogether. Learn to enjoy the silence, rather than constantly asking your partner what they are thinking.
Don’t psych yourself out
Your thoughts could be your relationship’s worst enemy or best friend. The quality of your thoughts can have a direct impact on your relationship’s quality. Negative thoughts can often create problems that don’t even exist. Whenever you start feeling insecure about your relationship, remind yourself that it is all in your head.
Get rid of your baggage to Overcome Insecurity
Have you ever been in a relationship so bad that you want to wish it all away and never think about it? You are definitely not alone because everyone will have baggage of some sort. It is okay to have some baggage, but you shouldn’t jump into a new relationship without lightening the load. If you have any lingering hurtful feelings, you need to let them go and see that a new relationship gives you the opportunity to put it behind you. Unresolved feelings will affect your current relationship, so get rid of your baggage before you enter into a new relationship.
Don’t look at things in black and white
When you are blamed for something that isn’t your fault, how do you respond? You become defensive and that’s what happens when you confront your partner regarding a problem. This will lead to a fight, which is not productive at all because you both will be busy trying to prove you are right, instead of resolving the conflict. Don’t point the finger immediately when there is a problem. You need to approach your partner with understanding and compassion. Understand that neither of you is fully right nor wrong. The real answer lies in the middle.
Avoid feeling paranoid over nothing
Everyone talks to people of the opposite sex. Don’t snoop through your significant other’s phone, emails, or social media conversations. You may calm your nerves if you don’t find something suspicious, but this behavior can and does become addictive. It can also damage the trust in your relationship if your partner finds out. Learn to not get paranoid over anything.
Don’t put off uncomfortable conversations
Sure, conflict can be stressful, but it can strengthen your relationship in the long term. You will grow close to your partner when you face your problems without any fear. Don’t mince words with each other and always be ready to say what is on your mind. This will bring you closer together and help you in overcoming the insecurity you feel.